The other day I went on a picnic at the beach (I made a little video on YouTube, you can watch it here). It’s such a simple and rewarding thing to do. To just prepare some easy food and get out!! The weather has been amazing these days, I can’t believe it’s still winter, it really looks and smells like spring.
The days are getting longer and with them my desire to go on adventures and explore the world is increasing. I’m always dreaming about exploring and yet I also love being at home with the people who love me. These are such contradictory feelings, but I carry them deep inside my heart. I guess all I need is a balance of both. See?! Balance is always the clue.
A while ago I talked about how I wanted to change my life in a good and positive way. Not that it was bad or negative before, but I jut wanted to improve it, because I’m very ambitious. To put you in perspective: I used to be rather negative and consumist. I wanted to be successful (the money kinda success), I wanted to have a university degree (the best one), I wanted expensive clothes and fancy things. Who doesn’t want that?!
Ironically:ME! I no longer want those things. Time has changed me and I like to think that veganism and running have been a huge part of this change that has been taking place inside me. I used to be so uncomfortable around life in general… And I was miserable. Because I wanted all those things I didn’t have. I was BLIND by then and I couldn’t see how rich I was, how rich I am (not talking about money here).
Now, after four years of university, the dreams I had when I started are left behind and I am lost. Still lost, always lost. And, as I didn’t want this situation to bring me down, instead, I decided to take advantage of it and give me some time to rethink about what I really want in life, my long term goals and my deep desires.
If there’s something I really know about myself is that I’m not made to be in an office waiting for the coffee break, I’ve never liked coffee anyways. I wasn’t born to do something I am not passionate about and I won’t waste any more time trying to be someone I’m not.
All I know is that I’m craving the sun & the moon. I’m craving watermelon. I’m craving love & adventure & endless summers. Good friends, trivial chats, fairylights.
I’m craving swims in the blue ocean & dinners under the stars. I’m craving photography & places & letters & songs. Emotions.
I’m craving laughter & tears & the breeze & road trips & evenings on the sofa & apples.
You may say that I’m a dreamer. But I know I’m not the only one.
And yes, all those things are real, all those things are LIFE. But we have been taught that they are only treats that happen once in a while. For sure we need money and education!! But working and learning is exciting as long as it’s something that makes you grow inside and something that fulfills and brings the best of you. And I haven’t found that, not yet.
By now, I’m still finishing my degree, but I’m also learning in the school of life and it feels good. What I’ve learned so far is that happiness comes from within, from the inside. No one can make you happy if you are not. I’ve also learned that passions are passions and you can’t ignore them. For instance, I’ve always been a creative mind. I remember as a kid I was always writing stories and making hand crafted stuff and painting. That’s what I’ve always loved, to be creative. And now I’ve developed all this creativity into photography and this blog and little projects and I LOVE it!! I can tell this is what makes me happy, what keeps me awake when I can’t sleep.
I just hope that some day everything will get into place. And I know it will, because I wholeheartedly believe that everything happens for a reason.
“Seek magic on the open road, music in the wind, healing in the ocean & love under the stars”
P.S. I’m really loving to vlog everything at the moment, so make sure to check out my YouTube chanel. I’d love to hear what you think and what you would like to see in the future!!
Keep Shining Beautiful Souls